Love the One You're With
by blackbeltchic
Summary: Buffy got back from patrolling one night, only to find someone despretly needed to get in touch with her. He showed up an hour later, and started making her life hell. To let him back into her heart, or not, was the thing she needed to decide. COMPLETE


Title: Love the One You're With  
  
Author: blackbeltchic  
  
Disclaimer: I own nothing but my love for this pairing. If I found something the tenth of what Buffy and Angel have, then I could consider myself lucky! Joss and Mutant Enemy own the characters, I've just kidnapped them for some fun. I, sadly, don't own anything.  
  
Posted: July 24, 2004  
  
Author's Notes: Well, I can't remember what story I read that made me think of this, but there is a story out there that I read, that made me come up with this. And the song, Love the One You're with, sung by some guy my mom listens to. I really wasn't paying attention, I was scheming up this story.  
  
Oh, for some reason, seems to like making my life miserable, so they've taken out my scene splitters. If it's been fixed yet, I don't know it, so I have to find another way to let you know. I think it detracts the beauty of the fic, but there's no other way, sorry!  
  
Dedication: I would like to dedicate this to every Buffy/Angel fan out there, and especially BAShipper, Queen Boadicea and Out-of-reality, for reviewing Marseilles, one of my other Buffy/Angel stories.  
  
(START OF STORY)  
  
"Buffy! Phone!" Andrew called as she stepped inside the apartment.  
  
"Good timing on my part," she joked, "Who is it?" Andrew shrugged, and Buffy knew he did know, but he didn't want to tell her. She sighed and took the phone from him, "Hello?"  
  
"Buffy." Was the only thing said, and yet she knew who it was.  
  
"Angel," she returned.  
  
"I have to see you. T-Tonight. God, everything..." he kept prattling on.  
  
"Angel, stop it. What's going on? What do you mean?" she wouldn't admit it, but he was scaring her.  
  
"It's too much for the phone. I'll tell you when I see you."  
  
"And when is that?"  
  
"Tonight."  
  
"Where are you?"  
  
"The airport...God, Buffy...Wait up for me. I have to go. See you soon..." he hung up, and she was left with no answers. She heard Andrew step back from the doorway and sit on the couch. She moved faster than humanly possible and grabbed him by the shirtfront.  
  
"Oh, I had so wished we were past this..." he whined.  
  
"How long was he on the phone?" she shook him, "How long did you talk to him? When did he call?!"  
  
"A-A couple hours ago...He called the first time right after you left, and then called on the dot each half hour after. He really wanted to talk to you."  
  
"What did he tell you? What did you two talk about?" she demanded.  
  
"N-Nothing! I asked if he had gotten the head he and Spike-"  
  
"Spike?!"  
  
"Oh, God," he cringed.  
  
"What about Spike?" she shook him harder, "What about him?"  
  
"H-He's been back. Since September. He was a ghost for awhile, and then he was a vampire again. I saw him when Giles sent me to get Dana, and then again when he and Angel came here looking for this head-"  
  
"WHAT?! They were here?! When?" she dropped him back onto the couch and started pacing.  
  
"When you had your date with the Immortal. They were pissed off once they found out you were out with him...something about him not getting their woman again...They were going to wait for you, but I advised them against it. That's all I know, I swear!"  
  
"Why would Angel want to see me now?" she groused, "Of all times, why now?"  
  
"There was an apocalypse," Andrew spoke up, and she spun to face him, "In LA. Sorta fuzzy on the details, but Angel started it to stop the big one, I think. Something like that." The doorbell rang, and Andrew straightened his shirt, "I'm going out with Chiara and Danielle. I don't know when I'll be getting back, so don't wait up." He waited for the retort, and when he didn't hear one he turned back to her, and saw the terror in her eyes. "Are you going to be ok? Should I cancel my date?"  
  
"N-No, you go out. I-I'll be...I'll be just fine. Don't worry 'bout me," she gave him a halfhearted smile, and he stared at her for a moment, before heading back to the door. After winding up living with the blond slayer for almost a year, an unlikely arrangement, he prided himself in knowing her moods, if only so he could get out of her way. He was just getting around to knowing when she was lying, and knew this was such a time. But he really didn't want to be around when the brooding vampire got there.  
  
He gave her one last look before he closed the door, watching her as she sat down heavily on the couch, pulling her knees up to her chest.  
  
"Who's that?" one of the girls asked, Chiara, he thought.  
  
"Just my sister," he lied. It was easier than telling them the truth.  
  
She heard the door close behind Andrew and sighed. She wanted to see Angel so much, and yet she didn't. She had tried so hard to move on, and now that she was almost succeeding, here he came, back into her life. She didn't know if she could handle it.  
  
When the quiet knock came an hour and a half later, she sighed, and got up to answer the door, knowing before she even stood up that it was him. She could feel it.  
  
"Angel," she welcomed him.  
  
"Sorry it took me so long, took me longer than I thought to walk here."  
  
"Why didn't you get a cab?"  
  
"Didn't have good cab experiences one of the times I was here."  
  
"Ah. Oh, uh, come in," he nodded and stepped inside, "though I don't suspect you need it, since you've been here before."  
  
He sighed, "I've been ratted out."  
  
"Just a little. What's going on?"  
  
"Last year, after stopping this demon from ending the world through world peace, yeah, funny, I was given the LA branch of Wolfram and Hart, a law firm. The Senior Partners have been planning an apocalypse since the beginning of time. When Fred died, through an accident, I made it look like I did it on purpose to get into this secret society, The Black Thorn. They were the ones who were going to bring about the apocalypse. I pretended to be evil so they would trust me. Then we; Wes, Spike, Illyria, Lorne, Gunn, and I, we took them out one at a time. We lost Wes in the process, and Lorne never showed up afterwards, he wasn't planning to. We all met in an alleyway, and we were bombarded by thousands of demons. I don't know how we got through. It might have been because of Willow's help, she shimmered in right before things got heavy, or the slayers she brought with her, but somehow we did it.  
  
"Gunn almost died. Illyria would have if she wasn't immortal. Spike...disappeared, but he wasn't staked. I slayed a dragon. The first thing we did was rush everyone to the hospital. Willow stuck around only long enough to make sure we didn't lose any more girls, then she too vanished. It wasn't until two days ago did I have enough time to myself to realize that something was different. I was different.  
  
"Through all the stress I missed that I needed to breath."  
  
"W-What?"  
  
"There's this prophecy. It talks about a vampire with a soul, beating the apocalypse and being redeemed for all of his bad deeds. The gift was mortality."  
  
"I-I don't understand."  
  
"I don't either. I-They made me sign it away, but somehow it didn't work right. We didn't even know if it was actually me they were talking about," he looked down at the ground, then back up at her, "So, what's new with you? Any...boyfriends or potential boyfriends?"  
  
"When you walked out of my life, you lost the privilege of asking that," she said harshly, then she sighed, "You know that song?" she went on to clarify at his stumped look, "The one about loving the one you're with?" he still looked at her, confused, "You know, it goes something like, 'if you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with,'? I've been doing that a lot lately. Trying, anyway. And I'm tired of it. No, no boyfriends, no potential boyfriends, I've given up.  
  
"I had what I thought was the perfect love, but it didn't last nearly as long as I would have liked. He left me, but all of my boyfriends do. Something about me being 'untouchable'. And that was one who knew me for what I was."  
  
"Don't ever give up. There's someone out there for you, Buffy, you just have to find him," he said, though it broke his heart to think that she didn't want to be with him, didn't love him anymore.  
  
"But what if I've already found him, and he's rejected me?" she sighed, wrapping her arms around herself, and he wanted to hold her close to him, "I can't go through that again. My heart couldn't take it." She didn't look at him.  
  
They stood in silence for a minute, then finally she spoke again, "It's late. You're more than welcome to stay here. Andrew's out, and knowing him, he won't be home tonight; you could have his room, or the couch."  
  
"I'll take the couch, thanks."  
  
"You're welcome. So, ah, I'll see you tomorrow?"  
  
"Bright and early," he nodded. She nodded, and then turned for her bedroom. "Goodnight, Buffy. Sleep tight."  
  
"You too." She walked down the hall and quickly closed the door behind her. Having him so close was killing her. She leaned against the door, waiting for her breath to slow, before getting ready for bed hurriedly. She hadn't even touched him, and yet she was so wound up. Just the thought of having him in her house...but they couldn't be together. She couldn't risk her heart getting broken again. It would kill her.  
  
She woke up the next morning, and lay with her eyes closed for a minute. It was all a dream, her head yelled at her. A fantastic dream, but a dream nonetheless.  
  
Then she heard someone in the hallway way too heavy to be Andrew.  
  
"Oh, shit." She heard after the sound of the lamp hitting the soft carpet. She opened her eyes and realized it was still dark out.  
  
It wasn't just a dream, she thought, Angel slept on my couch last night! This last thought made her a bit giddy.  
  
She threw back her covers and swung her legs out over the edge of her bed with grace that being the slayer gave her. She padded silently to her door and opened it. He stumbled down the hall towards the bathroom. She allowed herself to smile as she watched him in the most vulnerable situation she had ever seen him in.  
  
"Let me help you," she said quietly, her tone laughing, as she walked towards him and flicked on the switch.  
  
"Oh, ah," he was momentarily blinded, "ah, thanks," he smiled at her.  
  
"You're welcome," she smiled back. Then she saw his eyes traveling up and down her body and she shivered as he took in every detail. It was then that she realized she was only wearing a tank top and matching underwear. She squeaked a bit, embarrassed. She felt herself blush.  
  
"Ah, excuse me," he said, seeing her embarrassment, and he headed once more towards the bathroom. She smiled after him, before starting, her smile replaced with a frown, this wasn't right. She couldn't let him back in so easily.  
  
He found her musing over things at the kitchen table, with a mug of hot chocolate.  
  
"Couldn't sleep?" he asked, taking the second cup of cocoa from the counter.  
  
"I don't sleep much these days."  
  
"I still haven't gotten used to sleeping at night. Add jet lag, and my new body clock is all wacky."  
  
She looked at him, "I don't remember ever hearing you use that word before," she said slowly.  
  
"It was always your word, wasn't it?"  
  
"Willow was the one to coin the phrase, I think," she looked down into her cup.  
  
"Penny for your thoughts?" he asked.  
  
She sighed, "They'd cost you more than that," she joked.  
  
He dug into his pants pocket, and laid a dollar in the middle of the table.  
  
She laughed, musing over whether to actually tell him what was really on her mind, "Giles has offered me an advisory position at this new school of his, still in the planning stages," she lied. It wasn't a lie, but it wasn't what was foremost on her mind. "he wants me to go back to school to get my teaching degree. I'm wondering if I should take the offer."  
  
"Nothing's keeping you here."  
  
"Yeah, but if I got a better deal..."  
  
"Like what?" he sounded intrigued.  
  
"Oh, I don't know," but she did. If he promised to love her forever, then she wouldn't do anything else but love him. She shook her head mentally. She wasn't going into that. She wasn't letting anyone back into her heart. Especially not him, after the way he had smashed it so many times.  
  
"What are your plans for the day?" he asked, changing subjects.  
  
"Little bit of shopping, little bit of cleaning. I have to go check on Dana eventually. I don't work, if that's what you're asking."  
  
"Would you allow me to show you the sites? It's been awhile since I've been in Rome for pleasure, but..."  
  
"How about I show you the sites?" she asked, "Well, once it's light out. I'm gonna go for a run. Uh, you're welcome to stay here, or join me, whatever's best for you."  
  
"I guess I could use the exercise..."  
  
She nodded, though she didn't think he did, "I'll be right back." Fifteen minutes later she came out in red jogging pants and a black sports bra. "Aren't you going to change?" he looked sheepish, "Ok, so we'll get you some things later. Is five miles too much? I have to take Dana out later, so I don't want to over exert myself. I still have to patrol tonight too." He nodded, though he didn't know how far he could run.  
  
"So, how have you been?" he asked once they were jogging comfortably through the sleeping city.  
  
"Good. I'm loving this life. Ok, lack of social life these past couple weeks, but I patrol at my leisure, which is about every night, and the Council pays room and board and whatever else I need. I even get paid for patrolling! What have you been up to?"  
  
"Nothing much, pretending to be evil, gaining more and more power, saving the world," trying to love Nina, his head added silently.  
  
"Tough," she smiled at him.  
  
She had first shower when they returned, and it was all he could do to not picture her naked. Without thinking, he picked up a pencil and some paper, and began sketching her likeness; hands tangled up in her hair, water pouring over her breasts and stomach. He drew her abs from what he had memorized from beneath her sports bra, lightly toned and gorgeous.  
  
He was so absorbed by capturing her beauty that he didn't hear the shower turn off, nor her approach.  
  
"All yours. What's that?"  
  
He jumped, hurrying to crumble up the drawing. "It's nothing," he threw it into the trash. "Uh...I'll go take that shower now."  
  
She watched him leave the room, curious, before grabbing the crumbled sheet of paper. She was shocked to find it a drawing of her! She stared thoughtfully at the bathroom door a she heard the shower start up, then carefully picked up the drawing and placed it in the middle of a thick book to flatten it. Then she put the book in her room for safekeeping.  
  
It only took him ten minutes, five seconds to shower compared to her 25, she was counting, but the thought of him naked almost set her over the edge. It was the longest ten minutes of her life.  
  
"So, Mr. Newly Human, ready to go shopping?" she asked as he cam out of the bathroom. He wasn't wearing his shirt...Oh God....  
  
"Uh..."  
  
(SCENE BREAK)  
  
"Try these on!" she threw a red and a blue t-shirt over the door.  
  
"I don't do colors," he protested.  
  
"You do now." He came out a few minutes later in faded, tight fitting blue jeans, and the dark blue t-shirt, and she almost died.  
  
"What do you think?" he asked, pulling on the shirt hem, clearly uncomfortable.  
  
"Nice," she noticed his actions, "Stop that." She touched his hand to pull it aside, and it was like lightening went through them. "oh, um.....go-go try on the red one." She managed to stutter out. He nodded and as soon as he closed the door, she sagged against the opposite wall. "Mature plan. Save my heart plan," she muttered. She shouldn't trust anyone with her heart. Not again.  
  
She bought him three pairs of blue jeans, and five colors t-shirts. For the rest of the morning, she kept her distance, didn't want to feel the shock of touching his warm skin again.  
  
"Buffy," he reached for her hand to stop her, and she flinched at the touch, "What's wrong?"  
  
"N-Nothing. Just preoccupied," she said nervously, "So, you, ah, draw?"  
  
"I dabble..." he felt his face getting hot. Shit, she had seen the sketch.  
  
"Would you...draw me some time?" she asked slowly.  
  
"I already do," he blurted out, before he could think.  
  
"Why?" she stopped walking, and the crowd surged around them.  
  
Because I love you, he thought, "Because you're an easy subject. I know your movements as I know mine. I know your body better than mine," he flushed.  
  
"I've changed," she whispered, stepping closer, drawn to him. She could feel the heat radiating off his body, and it was driving her crazy.  
  
"Not to me..." he reached for her, and she pulled back.  
  
"I'm not ready," she answered his questioning eyes.  
  
He nodded, though still hurt at her refusal, and they began walking, "Want to get some lunch? My treat."  
  
She smiled her answer. "I'd like that." They found a little restaurant that used to be a tavern the last time he had been around Rome. They sat out on the terrace, Buffy eating a simple salad, while Angel tried pretty much every appetizer on the menu.  
  
She laughed at his latest reaction to one dish or another, "Remind me to take you to Texas to try fried pickles," she teased.  
  
"I'll try anything once. Twice if it agrees with me, and three times if I love it."  
  
She stared at him for the longest time while he was finishing up, and finally he noticed her gaze.  
  
"What?"  
  
"You just...never mind."  
  
"What?"  
  
"This is one of my dreams come true...seeing you in the sunlight," she whispered. He didn't know what to say.  
  
He paid, and they strolled off, closer than they had been before.  
  
"I need to do some grocery shopping," she told him, directing their stroll towards the market. They walked through the store, picking up things she needed, and indulging him some.  
  
"Let me know if you're tired. I walk everywhere these days, but if you're tired-"  
  
"As long as I'm with you, I'm fine."  
  
She didn't know what to say, "We're headed back home, to put these away, and then I have to go see Dana. She's doing really well. Now she's in this halfway house, and they, ah, know of her special conditions. Giles flew in this associate especially for her case. We're not sure if she can ever go patrolling on her own, she's never been patrolling even, but she's making a lot of progress. I, uh, wanted to be a part of her recovery."  
  
"She might have bad associations if I go. I'll find something to do, don't worry about it."  
  
When they got back, a teen aged girl was stashing her stuff behind the couch.  
  
"May I help you?" Buffy asked, an edge to her voice.  
  
"Hi, you must be Buffy. I'm Andy's sis, Chloe. My apartment building was foreclosed, and I'm transferring to the University here anyway, so Andy said he had a couch available for me to stay on. It's a pleasure meeting you," she gushed.  
  
"Uh, yeah. This is...Angel. Chloe, where is your brother?"  
  
"Kitchen." Buffy nodded, giving Angel a look that said stay put. She stalked off towards the kitchen.  
  
"Why didn't you tell me your sister was coming?" Buffy asked, smiling, slamming the groceries down onto the counter, hoping the eggs weren't on bottom.  
  
"Oh-uh, I-I uh...forgot."  
  
"Where the hell's Angel supposed to sleep?"  
  
"Didn't you guys used to date? Why not your room?"  
  
"Oh, no. No, no, no!"  
  
(SCENE CHANGE)  
  
"You all set?" she asked after settling into bed. He nodded, and she turned off the light, "you didn't have to wait up for me."  
  
"Habit, I guess," he said from the floor.  
  
"Remember the first time this happened? And I asked if you snored? Well, IO guess we'll find out tonight, huh?" she tried to make like the situation.  
  
"Yeah, I guess."  
  
(SCENE CHANGE)  
  
Angel was waiting for her when she got back from her run. She had gotten up early and gone without him. Andrew and Chloe were gone. It had been a long run.  
  
"Hey," she puffed, having pushed herself to her maximum during the run.  
  
"Can we talk?" he asked from the kitchen table.  
  
"Yeah, sure." She say down opposite him.  
  
"Buffy, I know that you were preoccupied yesterday, but the reason I came was because I love you, and I want us to start over. And if I'm not wanted, I'll leave. Just tell me what to do."  
  
She had been shaking her head, "I can't go through it all again, Angel. I loved you, and you left me once. I got you back, only to be left again. I- I'm untouchable. People can't get close. I can't risk it."  
  
"What?"  
  
"You leaving. Everyone leaves me. I can't do it again."  
  
He slid from his chair and sat on the floor beside her, "I wanted you to have a normal live, the one you deserved, so I left. Now I can provide that normal live, with no demons, no darkness or evil, so I came back. If you need to see me on my hands and knees, look. If you need to hear me begging and pleading for another chance, listen. And if you need proof that I still love you, need you, touch me now, and hopefully there won't be any doubts in your mind.  
  
"I'll wait for you for forever and beyond. Just tell me when."  
  
"Angel-" he put a finger to her lips to silence her.  
  
"If you love me, just kiss me."  
  
"I'm all stinky and sweaty," she protested weakly, sliding to the edge of her seat.  
  
"You're perfect," he breathed, pulling her off the chair and into his lap. She placed her lips on his delicately, her hands sliding from her lap, up his chest, to get lost in his hair. He caressed her cheek, then ran his hands through her hair, down her back, and wrapped his hands around her tiny butt.  
  
"I love you," she murmured against his lips, pressing herself into him. He licked her lips, and she let his tongue in.  
  
"I'll never leave you," he said huskily, breathing heavily once they came up for air.  
  
"I need you...now. It's been so long...too long. Angel..." he picked her up and carried her towards her bed room, kissing the whole time.  
  
(SCENE CHANGE)  
  
She woke in happy bliss. Angel was back, and he loved her. And he definitely wanted her. He had teased her until she was about ready to scream, before entering her gently, always waiting for her signal to continue.  
  
She rolled over slowly, her whole body relaxed, murmuring, "Angel," as she went, only to find only herself in the bed. "Angel?" her voice was high pitched and frantic as she opened her eyes, looking for him.  
  
"I'm right here, love. I promised I wouldn't leave you, remember?" He slid back into the bed beside her. She almost smiled to see him naked still.  
  
"I was having horrible flashbacks," she pouted, burying her face into his warm chest.  
  
"I'll never leave you," he ran his hands through her hair soothingly.  
  
"Where'd you go? What were you doing?"  
  
"Drawing how perfect you are," he reached over and pulled from her nightstand a piece of paper. He had drawn her sprawled across the bed, covers only coming up to her waist, her hair everywhere, sleep tousled. A slight smile played on the drawing's lips.  
  
"I don't sleep like this, do I?"  
  
"I improvised a tad," he smiled, kissing near her ear as she stared at the drawing.  
  
"Do I really look like this?"  
  
"No, you're beautifuller."  
  
"That's not a word."  
  
"There are no words to describe how beautiful you are, or how much I love you," she smiled, resting her head on his broad chest to listen to his heart thumping away.  
  
"Hm..." she mused.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Oh, just remembering that song. I'm finally loving the one I'm with. And I'm with the one I love," she smiled up at him.  
  
He kissed the top of hr head, "Me too, me too..."  
  
FINIS 


End file.
